>SPOILERS< Captain America: Civil War Review.


So let me fucking tell you about Bucky Barnes.

I have been so tired of him. I understood where everyone was coming from in the need to protect this damaged character, I understood that he was someone worth keeping an eye on since the comic arc with him was so cool. But I had heard enough after Age of Ultron. I didn't care about him anymore.

But let me fucking tell you about Bucky Barnes.

I would kill a man to protect him. It's like that was the damn plot of the movie. Ok, so starting off, I have never liked Steve Rogers more than I liked him in this movie. He was snarky and sarcastic but most importantly he was the Steve Rogers I wanted for Bucky. He risked, and ran, and fought, and did everything he could for Bucky Barnes.

So movie-wise, I love how they showed how much more Bucky could do with his arm: land on it, fight with it, fucking catch bullets with it. They also showed he could feel pain though it in his shoulder despite it. When he was falling down the stairwell, trying to get away from the government, he caught a railing as he was falling and cried out. They also really showcased that Steve and Bucky were super humans. They ran faster than cars on the highway, they took falls, jumps, hits, and really showed the super soldier side of these two characters.

So other than Bucky and Steve, have some character breakdown.

Vision: I get what they were trying to do with him and Wanda. I do. They get married in the comics and have babies blah blah blah. And at moments when they interacted it did seem natural, she laughed at it not being paprika. She smiled and explained things to him. But his fucking weird ass pullover sweater was off. He was also very easily overpowered by Wanda. (Which I enjoyed tbh)

Rhodey: I feel like he was our redshirt. He was never going to get his own movie, he was never going to be more than Tony's best friend. Tony lost Pepper, and we love to hurt him, so fuck it, let's take Rhodey from him too. Who cares. Fuck Rhodey. At least that is what it seems like?? Rhodey could have been utilized so much more past just being another gun that happened to not be attached to Iron Man's own suit.

Agent 13: Barely mattered. She was there to connect to Peggy. She was there to be their plot device to get them their gear, their inside man, as it were. She was there to weirdly kiss Steve. The person with whom Steve had flirted with that one time, and then attended Steve's long lost love's funeral together. Then lol this kiss was totes overdue because we dated in the comics. (That being said I did love how after the kiss both Falcon and Bucky were looking at Steve like 'yeeeahhh boi, get soooome'.)

Tony: I don't think he really showed any growth from the last movie. They just picked up the angst stick and beat the shit out of him with it. I loved the moment when they had weird young Tony in that simulation. That was fucking cool as shit.

Falcon: He really showed his dedication to Steve. You see a lot of his value and virtues come forth and they set him up as being someone who you could see becoming Captain America one day. I love that.

Black Widow: I love how they once again brought back her original fighting style. She could take out big dudes quickly and efficiently. Plot-wise, she was minimal. Though, I did love her bond with Steve when she came to the church so he wouldn't be alone. My heart. Also when they brought up The Hulk it was like a passing moment of 'oh that guy, aw' but it wasn't like a huge thing. Which was awesome because where the fuck did Hulk/Widow come from anyway, Joss?

Black Panther: Alright so in the comics this bitch took Captain America the fuck out. Just fucked him up when they fought. I feel like they didn't show enough of how completely badass and fierce he really is. I hope in the new Black Panther movie we get to see that and more of his staff and female warriors and his mother and sister and ug I love Black Panther ok.

Antman: Vaguely important? Did some stuff? Was there? He was more interesting and in character in this than in his own movie though.

Spiderman: Oh shit son, I am so fucking excited for this Spiderman. He's a kid. A goddamn kid in every sense. I'm thrilled. He's awkward and gets over excited about super heroes much like Ms. Marvel would. I love him because he is the young Peter Parker we didn't get. He's the actually a kid Peter Parker with his...unusually hot Aunt May.

Scarlet Witch: Her brother died? Does anyone remember that? Her other half? No? No mention of it? Lol ok. Regardless, I like how she got to show a lot of her powers. How powerful she was, lifting up large shit and moving it with ease. She took out Vision. She was kicking ass and taking names. All while wearing a corset though?? But for realsies, I love her and Hawkeye's relationship. He got to her, and she smiled and took his hand and was ready to leave Vision just like that. Good to go. She trusts him. When they were have their Very Important Airport Fight, she and Hawkeye were a force to be reckoned with. Their team up was badass and continually cool and unstoppable.

Hawkeye: *Cracks knuckles* Alright. Let me dive the fuck in. I love Hawkeye, it's to a fucking fault. Let me point out something first though, he didn't call himself Hawkeye in this movie. When he was introducing himself to Black Panther he called himself 'Clint'. I'm terrified they are going to pull out that time when Clint was like, "time to dress as a Ninja and do shit!" I do also love how they just threw away his family. Like he mentioned them twice, maybe? They didn't matter though. It was like 'yeah I have to do stuff, bye kids 4ever lol' and he went to be a badass. Can we also take a second to appreciate he was the one that gave Tony Stark the dressing down he needed? He basically called him a fuck up, and the fact they let Clint do that just gives me the warm and fuzzies. 

I wish they had done more with the fact that there had been other Winter Soldiers. Do you know how cool it would have been to have movies of them trying to beat these people, who they showed being able to beat Bucky? That would have been so fucking rad.

Favourite scenes:

'Couldn't you have done that earlier?' 'I hate you.'

And when Cap and Bucky were throwing the shield back and forth to each other while beating the shit out of Iron Man. God Bless.




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